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It may seem more romantic to light her fire after a wedding or a party, but odds are one of you will be too drunk to have a good quality romp.

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Back in May we wrote about a problematic new anti-revenge porn law in Arizona.As we've been detailing for a while, revenge porn is a horrible thing, done by disgusting people, but we're quite reasonably worried about many of the legal attempts to "deal" with it, because they're often overly broad, or create other problematic consequences.But for lesser beings like curly-haired men and people who need glasses, therapy can help.Sometimes a place is so special to you, it feels like it couldn't possibly continue after you're gone. I hate to bail, but I've been asked to do a commercial for the Boys and Girls Club of America, and I just can't turn down community service. This message is coming to you either from beyond the grave or because I am in the grip of insanity.

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Likewise, never keep paper pictures, tapes or films of naked juveniles where anyone else can find them.

Just like the time I was cleaning my closet and my mom and her friend Ron came in to take one of their grunting naps on the bed.

First, [Kenneth], I need you to go to the dry cleaners for me and find out how martinizing works. Then I need you to be back by noon to make the bathroom smell like sandalwood before I wreck it.

After I left Kentucky Mountain Bible College, it still kept going. Because if I do, that judge will make me join the Coast Guard. The first generation works their fingers to the bone making things; the next generation goes to college and innovates new ideas. The purpose of these DVDs is to educate and guide you through life in my absence. The Donaghys originally come from Ireland's little-known County Steve, where historically we were whiskey testers in goblins. I won the Avery Blaine Handsomeness scholarship to Princeton, and then attended Harvard Business School, where I was voted Most. I was the first person ever to say "I need a vacation from this vacation." The song "You're So Vain" was in fact written..me.

The third generation snowboards and takes improv classes. I'm sorry, sir, I was just sweeping your terrace and you came in and I was trapped.